Children

Divorce court settlement gamble?

Posted in Blog, Children, Court, Divorce, Guidance, Mediation, Money and Property | 0 comments

Divorce court settlement gamble?

On separation and divorce would you spend thousands of pounds on a bet to gamble the future of your children or your financial settlement on the toss of a coin? That’s what you do in a divorce court. Why do separating and divorcing couples who are otherwise careful, cautious and conservative decide to spend so much money gambling on the outcome of their divorce settlement about money and property? How are you turned from being sensible into a reckless gambler? You think your offer is good. You think your spouse’s offer is wrong. You issue court proceedings and go to trial to let a judge decide. You may as well toss a coin since it is cheaper and quicker. And just...

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Cambridge divorce

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Cambridge divorce

If you live in Cambridge then usually you would file a divorce petition in The Family Court at Bury St Edmunds at Triton House, St Andrews Street North, Bury St Edmunds, Suffolk IP33 1TR.  Most divorce petitions in the south east of England, including London are issued at Bury St Edmunds. The court staff are renowned for being approachable, knowledgeable and friendly. Whilst they are not allowed to give legal advice they can explain the procedural steps and provide free copies of court forms (tip: no need to pay for them online!) or Click Here to download them here for free.  For example a divorce petition is called FormD8 and can be found here and downloaded by...

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Helpful links and guides for separated parents or divorced parents

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Helpful links and guides for separated parents or divorced parents

So what guidance is available to help divorcing parents or separated parents? Firstly provide lots of reassurance to your children telling them that you both love them and that this will not change. Judith Wallerstein child psychologist concluded that the most valuable gift a separated parent could give to their child was to give their blessing and approval to seeing and spending time with the other parent. So what other help is out there? Resolution website is an accurate and reliable internet divorce website. Resolution has created the material for fantastic information meetings for separated parents called Parenting After Parting and you can click on the link here to...

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Divorce and avoiding the tabloids

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Divorce and avoiding the tabloids

For people who live their professional life in the glare of the media spotlight then there are real fears of their very personal and private life being exposed to the voracious scrutiny of the tabloids. When such a person is having a divorce or separation then the media can turn private grief into a disastrous tabloid feeding frenzy. The knock-on effects are not given any thought by the media or public. How can they be protected? It is typical that the star’s children will be shown the tabloid headlines in the school playground tomorrow morning and taunted with the gory details of the alleged (and often inaccurate) shortcomings of their Mum or Dad. Children naturally...

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Children are not harmed by divorce but by continuing arguments

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Children are not harmed by divorce but by continuing arguments

We know from the research that children are not harmed by the fact of their parents separating and divorcing. The real harm to children is caused when the understandable differences between separated parents turn into ongoing disputes and arguments so that the conflict is allowed to continue unresolved. Children are not harmed if you give them your approval to see the other parent So what should parents do? Firstly, children need reassurance that both parents love them. The next tip comes from the highly respected psychologist and researcher Judith Wallerstein carried out research with children whose parents had separated and she followed them over a long period of time...

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Divorce and separation. How do we tell the children?

Posted in Blog, Children, Divorce, Guidance | 0 comments

Divorce and separation. How do we tell the children?

Contemplating separation and divorce is daunting enough… but for parents the inevitable questions loom; “What do we tell the children?” and “How do we tell the children?” I have put together some guidance which has been gathered from my experience in the last 25 years of  working in this area and I hope that by sharing this knowledge freely with you it will help make things much easier and clearer for you and your family. I hope to help you to help your children. Guidance You have the first key already in your own question, “we” – you do tell them together. You need to agree what you do not tell them. They should never be...

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