Posts Tagged "Children Divorce"
Children are not harmed by divorce but by continuing arguments
We know from the research that children are not harmed by the fact of their parents separating and divorcing. The real harm to children is caused when the understandable differences between separated parents turn into ongoing disputes and arguments so that the conflict is allowed to continue unresolved. Children are not harmed if you give them your approval to see the other parent So what should parents do? Firstly, children need reassurance that both parents love them. The next tip comes from the highly respected psychologist and researcher Judith Wallerstein carried out research with children whose parents had separated and she followed them over a long period of time...
Read MoreDivorce and separation. How do we tell the children?
Contemplating separation and divorce is daunting enough… but for parents the inevitable questions loom; “What do we tell the children?” and “How do we tell the children?” I have put together some guidance which has been gathered from my experience in the last 25 years of working in this area and I hope that by sharing this knowledge freely with you it will help make things much easier and clearer for you and your family. I hope to help you to help your children. Guidance You have the first key already in your own question, “we” – you do tell them together. You need to agree what you do not tell them. They should never be...
Read MoreIs divorce and a broken home the cause of a broken society? No!
There are plenty of easy opinions and clichéd views flying around after last week’s riots about the behaviour of teenagers being the result of coming from a ‘broken home’. All the blame, and guilt, gets heaped onto separated and divorced parents by blaming divorce as being a direct causal link to unacceptable behaviour in teenagers and young adults. It is not that simple and the divorce rate has been going down. In fact the main harm to children is not from the fact of their parents divorcing but from being caught in the crossfire of on-going conflict. As a divorce solicitor I have a responsibility for not making things worse. In fact I am I am proud that many fellow...
Read MoreTop tips for children when parents divorce or separate
It’s ok for parents to read this too!! Whatever is going on around you remember these points: Both parents still love you Your parents never thought they would ever separate. Your parents are finding it very stressful to make the arrangements to separate You are not alone. Half of your friends are in the same position. About 50% of children live in a home without both parents. The key is having the support and love from both parents. Many children say that they can have the best of both worlds Coping with changes can be stressful The most stressful thing is being caught up in ongoing arguments It is tough coping with parents who are arguing and who appear to hate each...
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