Helpful divorce questions

We have set out below some questions for you to think through. Give yourself some quiet time and space. Use our future-focused questions to help you decide what it is you are trying to achieve:

What do you want to achieve?

  • What matters most to you?
  • What is really important to you?
  • What is your highest priority?
  • When you look back to this time in your life, in say 2 or 5 or 10 years time, how do you want to have coped with and handled this part of your life?

For separating parents:

  • What will the children thank us for now doing and arranging?
  • What might they resent us for doing?
  • When the children are in their 20’s, and they look back to this point in time onwards, what childhood memories do you want them to have?
  • What is the very worst we could do? How would that look? What must we avoid?
  • What is the best we could achieve?

Once you have had some quiet reflective time to work through your answers to these questions then you will be a lot nearer to working out:

a.    What you want to achieve?

b.    Which options best suit you and how you want to use us?

We hope you find these questions helpful in working out what you really want to achieve. Your answers are absolutely vital so we know how to help you in the best way we can.

If our bundle of questions has helped you work out what you want to achieve then please feel free to call us and we can guide you through the different options that may best suit your family:

Contact me Duane Plant on: 01223 421 051 or email me at

We are happy for you to give our bundle of helpful future-focused questions to your spouse or former partner.

If they respond appropriately then we may be able to do something constructive that is quicker, more effective and efficient such as a private meeting round the table or Collaborative law or Mediation.

If however your spouse does not or cannot respond in a similar constructive way then their attitude may flag up that your only choices are to resolve any dispute by traditional court proceedings or arbitration to get what you are entitled to.

Training specialist family lawyers:

We spend some time training other specialist family lawyers in using these questions and other skills so that family lawyers can remember to keep the answer in mind to our question to them, “Whose divorce is it anyway?” when too many divorce lawyers and other professionals are ready to impose their own or the court’s idea of a divorce settlement upon you rather than listening to how your family works in the real world. That’s because we are passionate that you should be in control of the tailor-made solutions and arrangements that best suit you and your family.


Divorce, Mediation and Family Law

Duane Plant or William Hogg01223 421 051

or email:

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