Divorce court settlement gamble?

On separation and divorce would you spend thousands of pounds on a bet to gamble the future of your children or your financial settlement on the toss of a coin? That’s what you do in a divorce court.

Why do separating and divorcing couples who are otherwise careful, cautious and conservative decide to spend so much money gambling on the outcome of their divorce settlement about money and property?

How are you turned from being sensible into a reckless gambler?

You think your offer is good. You think your spouse’s offer is wrong. You issue court proceedings and go to trial to let a judge decide. You may as well toss a coin since it is cheaper and quicker. And just as predictable and reliable. Are you someone whose idea of gambling is limited to buying a lottery ticket or a couple of quid on the Grand National? Amazing then that thousands of couples gamble between £5,000 and £50,000 to sit in court and wait with bated breath for the Judge to give judgement as to what (s)he thinks is the right answer about your house or money or pension or business – or children. Usually these are not people who would dream of putting such money on the 3.30pm at Haydock yet they do so in their local County Court. Shame then that the court system is not a justice system where all the wrongs and bad behaviour in a divorce are put right. Even bigger shame when the divorce court judge does not give you the answer but merely provides an answer.

The divorce court is not a justice system

Those couples who think they have even more to win or more to lose will always be able to spend even more money in legal fees and will always find a divorce lawyer who will explain the mysteries, complexities and uncertainties of the divorce court system. It is very sobering to realise the ‘Family Justice Review’ reported on 3rd November 2011 that the current family court system cannot really be called a ‘system’ at all!

Beware then of the so-called three-handed divorce lawyer who will tell you that “on the one hand it is like this and on the other hand it could be like that yet on the other hand…”! Also beware of the divorce lawyer who only has a legal toolbox stuffed with caselaw that they and the judge find fascinating but if neither of them has any other tools to resolve your family dispute based on the actual people, personalities, attitudes and behaviours involved.

Do you want to have a divorce settlement based upon your family’s values and what your needs and best interests are or do you want a divorce court judge to hand you stock, standard off-the shelf solution? Don’t pay bespoke prices for off-the-peg answers. So what can you do?

Constructive tailor-made solutions at off-the-peg prices

Forward-thinking divorce solicitors are able to advise you not only about the law and how it applies to you but they are also skilled at resolving disputes without the court and based on what is important for your family. Result? You get a tailor-made solution but at lower cost than the traditional court system. Most Judges and now the government agree that separating and divorcing couples should come to their own agreements and should be helped to make their divorce settlement arrangements. You can use Mediation where a couple meet round the table with a Mediator http://www.dmfl.co.uk/your-options/mediation/ or Collaborative Family Law which is also a meeting round the table but this time each spouse has their own Collaborative divorce lawyer http://www.dmfl.co.uk/your-options/collaborative-divorce/ In this way you get legal advice and support whilst reaching a settlement.

Family Mediator and Collaborative family lawyers putting you in control

Mediation and Collaborative Family Law are constructive and not destructive. You are put in control of the settlement outcome. Normally there are 3 to 5 meetings. You cut out the letters and court documents and hearings which means you cut out out vast amounts of legal costs. Mediation and Collaborative are quicker and cheaper. Sounds good doesn’t it? Not if you would rather put £50,000 on red and cross your fingers!

You can read more and use the checklist of when the collaborative approach may be appropriate for you (and when it is not) by Clicking Here>>

Next steps:

For further advice and guidance on collaboration:

Call me: 01223 421 051
or email me duaneplant@dmfl.co.uk

Duane Plant
Divorce Solicitor, Collaborative Lawyer and Family Mediator
Divorce, Mediation and Family Law